A few weeks after I quit my job, I got dumped.
I was already extremely depressed dealing with my newfound broke-ness and my break up was the straw on the camel’s back. At this point, I had been sleeping as much as I could to avoid overthinking about my financial situation. I would periodically Door Dash, but I quickly realized I hated the uncertainty. I would turn on the Door Dash app and I had no idea whether it would be a profitable night or a waste of my time. In addition, I do and always have despised driving, so making the decision to depend on Door Dash for my temporary source of income wasn’t the smartest idea.
Me and my ex broke up, because he wasn’t as comforting as a boyfriend should be. I would call him crying, because I couldn’t believe I was broke and unemployed. I have never been broke like this before, so when it finally hit me, it hit HARD. He basically told me you knew what you were doing when you quit your job and you need to get over it. I expressed my discontent and he ended up going off on me and breaking up with me.
I was in aw of how alone I felt from my own “significant other.” Fortunately, my friends have been EXTREMELY supportive and accessible when I have my rough days. Although I have gotten out of my funk, this has still been a rough journey. I have been interviewing and getting rejected constantly, which can definitely have an impact on your confidence. The last job I had I was hired and asked to start the next day, so I honestly didn’t think getting a new job would be such a strenuous task. I knew this wouldn’t be easy, but I have been unemployed for a month and it has been depressing.
The old Michaela always had a plan… what are you doing sis? This is what I’ve been asking myself day by day. Honestly, I am so happy that Queen Media Collective has officially launched and kept me busy. After the break up, I wanted to stay in my room and eat Ben and Jerry’s all day, but I knew I had too much shit to get done to sulk. What good would sulking do? My piece of shit ex left me and deep down I knew it was for the best. I had to focus on my new business, being successful and the next chapter in my life.
One of my close friends told me not to rebound due to it being “unhealthy,” but honestly it is a good distraction in my opinion. The best way to get over someone is to get under someone they say LOL. Okay that is kind of outta pocket, but where’s the lie? I don’t agree you should physically get under somebody (unless that’s your MO, no judgement over here!), but to go on a few dates and have someone to text… what’s wrong with that? I feel that you can process a break up and mingle at the same damn time.
In between Door Dashing, spending time with my friends and working on QMC, I still felt like I had too much free time. Prior to the break up, every free moment I had I would be on the phone with my ex boyfriend, so I felt like I needed something to fill the void. I started texting my friends more, but it isn’t the same. It feels good to get a good morning or hey cutie text from a whole snack. Therefore, I decided to make a Tinder.
Even though I haven’t had the best luck with Tinder (please read the attached article from the Boyfriend Series), I was like you know what, it’s been three years since that disaster of a relationship… let me see what’s up. Let me tell ya’ll, three years later Tinder is still and will always be A TRIP LMAO.
Soon as I made my profile, well actually, I was able to reactivate my old profile, I started to update it. My bio had contained the following: Goofy, laid back and open minded. If you’re looking to hook up I am not about that life, swipe LEFT. As I was about to edit it, I started thinking and came to the conclusion that my bio from three years ago would still suffice. Since I got on Tinder, which was about two weeks ago, I have encountered horn dogs, weirdos and I even got catfished (yes, it’s still possible to get catfished in 2018).
I met this dude on Tinder who initially looked like the total package… colored eyes, 6’3 and a little chubby like I like. We even FaceTimed, but when I met him in person it was NOT the spirit. The conversation started when he messaged me and asked what I was doing the upcoming weekend. I told him I had no plans and he told me he was going to the Drake and Migos concert. Naturally, I responded by saying, “OMG I’m so jealous!” Then he offered to take me. Of course I agreed like anyone would! A whole snack offering to take me to the Drake and Migos concert?! YASSS.
However, more details unfolded after I gave him my number. He confessed that his mother would be going with us. Now how weird is that! You never met me before and we are going to a concert with your mom?! He explained that his mom is cool and that I could feel free to “be myself,” but regardless of what he said, it sounded like a weird and awkward experience. He explained to me that his mom convinced him to buy another ticket, because he was the last of his siblings who wasn’t married and he needed to get out there and date. In my head I was like wtf, but I was still intrigued by the opportunity to go to a free concert (Yeah I know, I ain’t shit).
So it’s the day of the concert and me and this young man were discussing our plans for that day. His plan was for us to get food and drinks in downtown Hayward and then head to the Oracle for the concert. Okay, a man with a plan I thought. I was here for it! I asked him how we would be getting to the concert and he said something like “Oh we could drive or we could take BART, whichever you prefer, but parking is like $40.” I wondered why he had told me the price for parking, but I didn’t really dwell on it. I just said, “Whichever you prefer is cool with me,” and he said okay.
I met this man at his house and he told me I could park in the back of his apartment complex. I drove to the back of the apartment, he walked out and... breh… this man did NOT look like his pictures AT ALL. I mean, it was clearly the same person, but those pics had to have been like eight years old. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. If you know me you know I am not a superficial person AT ALL. I don’t give AF about looks, but this man was not it chief LOL.
So in my head I’m like FML! I then reluctantly open my car door to get out and simultaneously he’s opening my passenger door saying, “Um you’re not ready to go?” I said, “Umm, what do you mean?” and he gets quite. After his awkward silence, I connected the dots. “Wait I’m driving?!,” I asked, in the most appalled way. “Ugh yeah I thought you knew, that’s why I brought up the cost of parking.” BIHHH I couldn’t believe this man! How dare you assume I am driving?! He gets really nervous and says, “I mean we can take an Uber, it’s no problem,” but then I said, “No it’s no problem, I’ll drive.” This man then sits in my car smelling like IDK what and I proceed to drive to the liquor store.
I silently drive us to the liquor store (which is clearly not the food and drinks in downtown Hayward plan we discussed) and I am quite, because I am still shook that this man expected me to drive. I asked where his car was and he told me it was in the shop getting a smog check LOL. So you mean to tell me this grown ass 32 year old man just hit me with the my car is in the shop line?! I was done after that. He then says “So how long have you had this car?” I tell him only a year and he says “What you just don’t like driving it?” and I said “Honestly, I don’t like driving period.” He looks at me dead in my face and says, “Well I can drive, that’s always an option.” I must of almost rear ended somebody… I said, “I’m not letting you drive my car!,” and he responds with, “I’m just saying, we have options.” I was thinking girl you gotta escape and you gotta do it NOW! The old Michaela would have stayed and endured this horror date in order to be nice, but new Michaela gave no F’s.
We finally got to the liquor store. This man asked me “Should we get one bottle or personals?” I respond saying “Personals.” He says, “Okay, I’ll run in and get it. What kind of chaser do you want?” I respond “Coke.” He goes into the liquor store and without batting an eye I “skurted off” as my sister described it as after I told her what happened LMAO. I feel REALLY bad, but honestly I had to get out of there. I have no regrets and although I could of handled that better, it is what it is. I wasn’t going to share this with you guys, but honestly I just can’t believe this happened to me. I hope you guys don’t judge me and I would love to hear your feedback of how you’d of handled this situation.
I am now unemployed, single and living that entrepreneur life. I could be better, but I am doing okay! I have started reading books, trying to gain more wisdom for the obstacles ahead of me and really focusing on what makes Michaela happy. I love ya’ll and appreciate you for the support! Had to give you an update, it’s only right.