Going Against the Status Quo

We all dream of the day we can go after our dreams in life but for a lot of us, that is just how far it goes. How many of us take action to move closer to our desires? Do we let fear stop us? Complacency? Often we get caught up with life responsibilities and as a result, our dreams get left behind and pushed down the totem pole on the list of importance. For many of us we are trying to survive and put a roof over our heads, food in our stomach, and keep the bills paid; especially living in the Bay Area. You must have more than one hustle to make it out in California because everything is so expensive; as a result, going against the grain and deciding to go after your true passions could be very challenging. No one can tell you what to expect because every journey is different. Personally speaking, I refuse to become complacent because my dreams have kept me going in times of darkness.

On top of pursuing my passions, my biggest priority is my child. I feel the continuous pressure to provide however I truly feel like I’m doing a disservice to myself if I get comfortable at a 9-5 job. I will admit it is easier to just stick to the normal course in life and not go outside of our comfort zone but that is boring and quite frankly a non-fulfilling way to live. This past Sunday my sister from church reminded me of the importance of pursuing our passions in life because if we do not it will leave a huge void. Often we as women put our dreams aside to raise our family and to be a loving and supportive partner which causes a lot of us to neglect our own needs because we put others first. As a mother myself, I can admit I once lost my identity in my role because motherhood is very demanding and a lot of times our desires and needs get pushed aside. During my conversation with my big sister from church she told me she was being honored for reaching her 31st work anniversary, I thought to myself “wow, it’s very rare to see someone these days stay at a job that long because most people move on rather quickly in comparison to the older generations.” As she continued to tell me her story of taking the job years ago to support her children and to be a supportive wife she put her dreams of pursuing higher education on the back burner, and I could tell that decision still haunts her. Although this happened very long ago I could tell that she was yearning for more. At this point in her life, she is ready for a new change, she would like to go back to school and get her Master’s degree and work in a field that she is truly passionate about as opposed to a “job”. I commend her for being open and honest about where she is in life and wanting to make the necessary changes to get where she wants to go. I also admire her strength for making the sacrifices she needed to make for her family and now working on herself. Whether she knows it or not her message is very important to women because we need to be reminded to never stop going after what we want because ultimately we only have one life to live.

The late great Nipsey Hussle said it best, “hard work, dedication, and patience”. For one to successfully go against the status quo all three elements are a must. Hard work is key in any situation because you only get out what you put in. To be successful you must embrace the work as opposed to avoiding it. Dedication because you must have an unwavering commitment to your dream, one that makes you want to see it through. Patience is very essential because success does not happen overnight, it takes time so if you are thinking of just the glitz and glamour of your dream and not the grind behind it you might want to reconsider. In the pursuit of your dreams just know you will be tested, that is why it is important to have a clear vision of where you want to go and a solid commitment.

According to the Miriam-Webster dictionary, vision is defined as “ the ability to think about or plan the future with imagination or wisdom”. One must have a vision for what they want out of life and have the drive to execute their plans. I would tell anyone to make a vision board of their dreams and goals because these boards allow you to see your plan daily which makes it a good reinforcement tool. Vision boards are also a good way to manifest things in your life.

Going against the “normal routine” in life is hard because you sacrifice things not everyone around you does or even understands. From my personal experience, older generations want you to do something stable. Find a job and work it until you retire. It’s hard for them to hear you don’t like a job they will say “Like, what does that word have to do with JOB?” They are serious. My parent’s come from that older generation where pursuing your dreams is a luxury and in today’s time more and more millennials are taking advantage of this era and redefining what success is and going against the “routine” bestowed upon us by our family.

Trust me, it is not easy going for what you want to in life. In all honesty, it can be scary because of the unknown. However, that is why faith is so important. Without faith, your journey will be hindered because you will always be doubting yourself and negativity will feed off of it. Going against anything is hard, redefining or should I say taking control of what you desire in life is not easy but if you want it, it’s up to you to make it happen.


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