A long time ago in a galaxy far far away before I was this amazing happily married man, I was a hoe. This was something that my wife and I had a long discussion about while we were dating and she was highly shocked. The somewhat quiet black nerd with glasses that she knew simply transformed before her eyes. This somewhat hoe phase of my life though was something that I’m glad happened and yet ashamed of. There were multiple lessons, strategies, aspects of my life that were involved for the better and worse. This phase of my life seemed to help me not only become a better man to the love of my life, but also gave me a better understanding of women. In this article I’ll explain the pros and cons to why I believe everyone should have a hoe phase and the portions that still affect my life.
So let’s get over the obvious thing that came out of this hoe phase of my life, sexual experience. In regards to the sexual experiences I mean learning about getting a better understanding of my sexual preference and my partners. I learned what type of rhythm caused me to climax and would cause my partner to do the same. Learning how the best way to control your own body and control of it is simply by breathing. From having multiple safe sex partners I learned how to read women’s bodies without having them speak. The obvious statement is all women are different but at the same time I was able to learn that there are many sexual preferences that women have in common that can be used. To me though, the most important thing that I was able to learn from this hoe phase of my life was confidence. It felt like I was playing a game of chess constantly in my head while I was dealing with multiple women at once. You make a move, your partner makes a move. They strike, you counter, a constant mental game of back and forth. Someone always tries to catch you off guard and make sure that you are who you say you are. Being comfortable who you are in your own skin can get you very far with those that are around you.
The cons to these are some various things that people always try to bypass and ignore. Your reputation is something that gets brought into the conversation. People, not only women, people talk all the time about everyone’s business. There have been multiple times where people that don’t know me on a personal level ended up finding things that were going on in my social life either because they saw me somewhere or that person told our business. These things can sometimes spread like wildfire for no reason at all and always cause more problems than unnecessary. Emotions, many times people sign up for things thinking that they are able to separate physical activity and emotions separately. This is not the case. Every single time that I got involved with women who stated that they would not make things awkward or worse by adding emotions into this relationship always end up doing that exactly. Emotions can cloud your judgement and make you do things that you normally wouldn’t do which is the issue. The last issue that always seems to haunt me is running into those from my past. I always knew that the Bay Area was somewhat small but big at the same time, it can get awkward sometimes when you are out with people and run into someone from that lifestyle. First thing people want to ask is how I know that person and want to know every single type of information that we shared.
In conclusion, a hoe phase can always be a positive and negative part of your life that can lead to one important thing in your life, growth. Growth as far as learning about yourself, your body, and how to better pleasure your partner. Just like many jobs want you to have good experience in your career growth and experience can always be used to get closer to someone that you love. Never allow anyone to judge you and tell you how to live your life because at the end of the day you control your life. If you find someone that is making you happy in your life then continue doing that. The day that someone tries to make you feel negative about that, is the day that you will learn that they are jealous of you and want to do the same thing but are afraid.