Lately there have been a lot of posts floating around social media regarding “red flags”. Seeing these posts on social media reinforced one thing I already knew: we are ALL living the exact same life lol.
As I’ve read all the red flags people have posted, there’s one that I realized I’ve observed that I never thought I would.
Jealous niggas who don’t want their girl to be more successful than them.
Because I am so supportive when I am involved with or dating someone, I don’t really understand how someone could not be. When I care about someone even if we are not dating, I am their biggest cheerleader doing anything I can to help them succeed. However, there are times it hasn’t been reciprocated with men and “friends” in my life.
It seems that because of Queen Media Collective, Reckless Behavior and the amount of followers I have, some niggas feel some type of way.
These are some of the comments I’ve heard the last few years:
“I already know your DMs probably crazy so I have no interest in following you on Instagram and seeing all the attention you get.”
“Oh, I’m dating a celebrity”
*sees my Instagram story*
“Oh you just support everyone don’t you”
“I know you know some people but let me introduce you to _______. You’re my girl, I want to be the one responsible for your success”
“People love you… there’s a high chance you’re going to be famous before me…”
All of these comments were made in the most sarcastic, hater ass tones. I have ignored these comments in the past, but now I refuse. Some men truly have an issue dating someone who can potentially be more successful than them and it’s pathetic. If anything, a boss bitch should make a man want to boss up, not huff an puff.
When reflecting on this, parts of the Phenomenal Woman and Still I Rise poems by Maya Angelou come to mind:
It’s in the reach of my arms,
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I’m a woman
Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I’ve got diamonds
At the meeting of my thighs?
If someone you’re dating or your “friends” shows signs of being salty about your success and potential, you need to let them go. The person you are dating and people in your circle should be your biggest supporters, not your not so secret haters. And be aware that this can also happen more passively, like them not sharing or liking your promo content on social media and/ or them simply not buying something from your brand.
I’ll never forget when G Biz texted me about the Street Soldiers interview opportunity. I was sooo excited to do that interview, because they have a huge following. I was on a date getting some JJ’s with this one dude, and I was like “OMG I’m really about to be on Street Soldiers! This is huge!” He gave me the saltiest hug and was like “I’m happy for you babe, that’s what’s up…” He didn’t realize it, but his tone was not matching his words at all and his body language during the hug was very stand offish. Soon after that he was like “I really have to get serious about my training program.” Like okay? This is not a competition my guy lol. Now I have NOTHING wrong with motivating and sparking a fire in someone, but someone’s whole mood changing when they hear of my good news just ain’t it.
Believe me when I say that someone’s negative response to your success and accomplishments is nothing to ignore. If you come across someone displaying these types of behaviors, do yourself a favor and cut them off friend. Nothing but positive vibes allowed.