What We Tolerate For The D

I’m exhausted. The other day I started to think about all the BS I’ve been dealing with the last six months and I said “Yeah no.” I deleted all my dating apps and blocked like five people. The scum I have been entertaining just for the D just isn’t worth it to me anymore.

For you to fully understand, I am going to share details about the niggas who were on my “roster” at some point in 2021.

THE SHORT ONE

I’ve known this man for years. We used to mess around back in 2018, but this time around he approached me about going to dinner. I said okay! Maybe he is on some other shit now. But lo and behold after the dinner, he went right back to “let’s cuddle” “come through”. Then had the audacity to get an attitude when I asked what his intentions are. “A part of me wants to just be friends with benefits, a part of me wants more.” Like how are you 31 and don’t know wtf you want? I said “If you just want to be friends with benefits, why are you saying you want to take me out and go on trips?” With the same attitude he then says “Two single people can’t go out and enjoy themselves?” So then I say you know what Michaela? The sex is good, fuck it. Just know that that’s all it’ll ever be and accept it. But after the funky ass attitude he gave me just for wanting clarity, I started to feel disgusted.

THE NIGERIAN ONE

This person was a friend of mine. I said we shouldn’t mess around, but I still proceeded to do it like a dummy. Despite expressing how I wanted to see him during the day and go out and do things together, he only asked to see me after he got off work at midnight which is convenient for him, because his job is like ten min away from my house. Despite having work at 7:30 am, I would stay up and wait for him so I could get some affection and not have to sleep alone. I would even let him eat some of my food and brought him lunch one time so he didn’t have to Door Dash. Three days after bringing him lunch, I get uninvited to his going away party the day of (after changing my work schedule to attend), because he started to have “second thoughts” because his parents are “traditional” and would think my presence at the party meant more than it was. Oh, so I’m good enough for sex and to be your Door Dasher, but not good enough to meet your people? Plus, he initially lied about why I couldn’t come anymore, claiming it was now a small family event. Then I got the email blast from his family saying “Can’t wait to see everyone today!”. That was so hurtful to me.

THE ENTITLED ONE

This 33 year old, CVS working, twin bed having mf had some nerve lmao. First of all this man invited me over then felt some kind of way, because by coming over to his house at 8PM I knew “What was up” even though we only discussed having food and drinks and getting to know one another. Who are you to assume that just because I come over at night (which 8PM doesn’t even count as booty call hours to me) you are supposed to get some? BLOCKED!

THE PLAYER

To read about what happened with this man revert back to my Heaux Tale. After not hitting me up since the incident, this man hits me up claiming he went to jail that night and is just now getting his phone back. He invites me to his birthday party and asks me to start over without taking any accountability for the awkward situation he put me in that night. I start to express how he’s crazy for thinking he can come back into my life after that dramatic ass night, he yells at me about how if I don’t wanna fuck with him, I don’t gotta fuck with him and hangs up in my face. I then sent him a long message about how he has has issues and needs to seek help before I used that handy dandy block button.

THE SUCCESSFUL ONE

This man sold me a dream talking about all the future trips we were going to go on, how I was going to meet his family and all the other things we would do together. Then after us going to one party together, and out to dinner one time, would hit me with the “When can I see you? Want to come over tonight? I’m so exhausted from work.” Granted he did work a lot of hours, but in his spare time he would be partying and spending time with his friends. So it’s not that you don’t have the time to spend with me, you are just choosing to turn up instead… every single weekend. Eventually I called him out on it and he tells me “Because work is so draining, I can’t give you what you want right now as far as consistency. But I’d love to keep having sex, because our sex is magical.” Hmm, how does one respond to that? How about BLOCKED!

THE NURSE

So this man is the least outta pocket. But I would be annoyed, because he lives ten min away from me and would barely make effort to spend time with me. Like 10 MIN?! Really. And I only see you once a month. In addition, he casually brought up in conversation how he will probably be moving to Texas. I was like okay, so why are we even trying to date if you are most likely moving?! He said I need to just “Live in the moment” and “Go with the flow”. Sir, how about you go to hell.

I know this blog is giving bitter, but I don’t care! I truly feel bad for all the women who are out here dating and dealing with similiar/ if not the exact same BS. My cousin wrote her blog I’m Not Your Fun Girl yesterday and it definitely inspired me to follow up with this because WTF! Grown ass men playing games has just got to stop. Cause I can speak for all Black women when I say, we tieeeed. Fed up. Over it.

Alone and rich with eight cats is sounding real appealing at this point.


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