Can Your Soul Mate Be Toxic?

Photo by Julian Myles on Unsplash

When most people think of their soul mate, they think of the person they are going to spend the rest of their lives with—an equal who will bring the best out of them and vice versa. No one thinks that it’s possible to have or have had a soul mate who brings out the worst in you or have toxic traits/behaviors about themselves. But believe me when I say it is possible to have a person in your life you consider a soul mate, that is toxic. Just because a person is your soul mate it doesn’t mean you will end up spending your life with them and it may also turnout they weren’t your soul mate at all no matter how connected you may have felt to them.

One thing that everyone must first understand is that there are soul mates, twin flames and karmic partners—all which one may confuse as a soul mate if they do not know the difference between the three. So what I’m going to do is give you all a breakdown of the three kinds of relationships and ways to tell if you are in a karmic, soul or twin partnership.


These relationships may be the most toxic of them all. Karmic connections are those relationships you can’t seem to let go. You go separate ways yet some how come back to each other thinking there’s some unfinished business that needs to be handled. In karmic relationships the lessons you face tend to deal with how one views the outside world and other people. Word of advice, once a karmic relationship ends it’s highly suggested it stays that way as these can be tumultuous and intense relationships, like a roller-coaster; once you get off you some how find yourself on another one with the same person or a person who exhibits similar partners because you enjoy the thrill. These type of connections can leave you feeling like being alone isn’t so bad and love isn’t worth having.

Signs of a Karmic Connection Include a few of the following:

  • On & Off Again Relationship
  • Repeating patterns from the past
  • One or both partners are more in love with the idea of love, based on superficial reasons
  • Selfishness
  • You become mentally, physically and emotionally dependent on the person
  • Your dark side is revealed
  • You may began to act like someone you don’t recognize


A soul mate can come in many forms: family, friends or a lover. When it comes to soul mates it’s said that this is the relationship that usually comes after you’ve learned all you’ve needed from the karmic relationships you’ve endured. When you meet your soul mate you tend to feel like you’ve met the one person you’re going to be with for a lifetime. They give you this sense that you’ve known each other your whole lives. This person gives you a feeling you’ve never felt before and you want it to stay but just because it feels right doesn’t mean the relationship is going to be smooth sailing. Like any relationship that brings about challenges, your soulmate will  bring up internal lessons surrounding your self-worth, fears and if you deserve love, to name a few. A soul mate will make you want to work on bettering yourself unlike in a karmic relationship you may focus on trying to change your pattern to your liking.

Signs of a Soul Connection Include:

  • A strong sense of familiarity
  • You have a strong friendship aka best friends
  • You’ve unknowingly crossed paths before connecting
  • You share similar life goals
  • You two are okay being apart but would rather be together
  • You respect each other’s thoughts, opinions, differences, etc
  • Both know how to put their pride to the side & apologize when wrong.
  • You see marriage in your future
  • You fight for your relationship
  • You can be yourself
  • You balance each other out


Not every one will have a twin flame as one does a soul mate or karmic relationship and they can only ever have one twin flame. Your twin flame can be described as your mirror or other half; two people split into two different bodies who share one soul. The twin flame connection isn’t really based on romance, which it can often lead to, but spiritual growth. When you come into contact with your twin flame you may not know immediately. In order for your connection with your true flame to remain strong you have to be willing to be honest and love unconditionally.

Signs of a Twin Flame Include the following:

  • A powerful connection – feeling perfectly balanced and aligned with this person.
  • You experience deja vu’ as if you’ve had a past life together
  • You share the same dreams
  • You have significant differences despite sharing a deep soul connection
  • You share a telepathic or physic connection – therefore feeling the same emotions or illnesses at the same time
  • Despite the challenges you face in the outside world you both still make each other a better person
  • You can look in each others eyes all day without feeling awkward

Now on to my original question, can a soul mate be toxic? From looking into the three types of relationships, any relationship can turn toxic whether it be with a soul mate, true flame or a karmic partner, which in my opinion is the most toxic of them all.

I started wondering if a soul mate could be toxic when I kept finding myself having this deep connection and magnetic pull to this guy I talked to on and off for about 4 years. No matter how intense of an argument we got into or no matter how many months we went without speaking, we somehow found are way back to each other. I couldn’t deny how beautiful of a friendship we had and how much love was felt between the two of us. The relationship and our friendship was full of passion but also a ton of toxicity. I started to think to myself this had to be my soul mate but how when at times we could treat each other so badly and had never called a couple? We had the potential to be soul mates but the repeated bad behavior we exhibited lead to a toxic relationship or what I described above as karmic. I began letting this man get away with a lot of things I wouldn’t let anyone else and that lead to so much toxic behavior you shouldn’t have to deal with from your other half.

It’s possible to break the toxic behavior and get back to what once was beautiful but you have to be willing to be honest and call out your pattern on their shit, while being respectful of course. It’s all about working together as a team and not letting the outside world influence the foundation you’re building.



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